Woof, woof! Scary dreams are common. Nightmares occur during a light phase of sleep, known as rapid eye movement (REM) sleep, when the brain is very active. Approximately, half of children between the ages of 3 and 6 experience nightmares and as many as 1 in 5 children (20%) aged 6 to 12 years have nightmares at least once per week.
Although the exact cause of nightmares can vary per child, sleep research suggests a strong link between nightmares, daytime stress and anxiety. Some studies theorize that nightmares might be a way for the brain to process upsetting material and big life changing events (e.g., starting school, birth of a sibling etc.). Likewise, nightmares might be a sign of emotional overload.
The early years of childhood are filled with big emotions, leaving some researchers to speculate that both the development of imagination and a growing awareness of the world might fuel subconscious nighttime fears. Nightmares don’t necessarily mean something is “wrong,” rather they can be viewed as an indication of how your child is processing the world.
When it comes to nightmares, you are your child’s safe base. Identifying and labelling the experience is important to convey that what just occurred in the dream did not happen in the real world. Next time she wakes up, clearly explain to her that the nightmare is over, that she is now awake and safe in her bed. Creating space for your daughter to talk about what appeared in her bad dreams, as well as, her daytime worries can help to pinpoint any stress as the source of sleep tension. Offering reassurance and validation, even if the concerns seem unrealistic can go a long way in making your child feel more comfortable and calm.
The limited vocabulary of early elementary school children can prevent many parents from getting a clear idea of potential nightmare triggers. Integrating a worry box and/or a visualization practice as part of the bedtime routine can lead to a deeper understanding of your child’s fears and can also reduce the chances of hearing a sudden call out a few hours past midnight. Before bed ask your daughter to draw out her worries and to “put them away” for the night into a lidded box or container. Then, encourage her to imagine a favourite place that she can go to stay safe – like the beach, the playground or a cozy fort. You might also try adding a designated comfort item to the bedtime routine, such as a special stuffed animal or blanket to provide a sense of security, ease anxiety and promote better sleep.
Tail-wags and many wishes for sweet dreams,