A “Joyful” Season?

With the endless demands of the season, I’m worried about stress taking over!

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Question

Dear Clem,

The holiday season is approaching, while I love the festivities, I find it challenging to handle my grandkids’ excitement and meltdowns during this busy time. I often look after the kiddos during the winter school breaks, and help out on the weekends by watching them while my daughter deals with the endless demands of the season. I’m worried about stress taking over. How can I help keep things joyful and balanced for everyone?

Overwhelmed G’ma

Clem's Response

Woof, woof, the holidays! My tail is wagging just thinking about it. To me, this season is pure joy but also a bit of sensory overload. Change in routine and new expectations can lead to big feelings for four legged and two legged friends alike.

My first suggestion is to check-in with how you’re feeling before it’s time to care for the children. Kids sense when you’re stressed and often feed off their guardian’s energy. Staying relaxed can help diffuse overwhelm and a calm demeanor will also set the tone for de-escalating emotional situations. Set aside time for yourself and get plenty of sleep before the kids arrive. It’s easier to keep up with their energy when you’re at ease and rested.

In fact, the kids will also manage being at Grandma’s house better if they stick to their sleep routine! As tempting as it may be to let kids stay up late and sleep late throughout the holidays, try to stay within an hour of usual times. Same goes for mealtimes. Prepping meals or snacks in advance can help keep to the schedule and reduce hectic moments in the kitchen.

Try being as up front as possible with the kids about the boundaries you have so they can know what to expect during their time with you. Same goes for letting them know what you can and cannot pull off when it comes to activities. It might be beneficial to have a flexible plan with a mix of active and calm options—like crafting, getting outside, or movie time to keep things balanced.

When a strong emotional response occurs, be patient. Kids need time to process their feelings. Let them express their emotions, and offer comfort rather than dismissal. Try using language that validates their experience. If they need space, let them know you’re there when they’re ready. As they calm down, gently shift their focus and then later, you could talk about what happened in a non-judgmental way. Helping to label their emotions, to acknowledge why they felt that way and to brainstorm ways to handle similar emotions in the future, will make for smoother regulation in the future.

Remember, things won’t go as planned and that’s okay! You can still bring magic to the holiday.

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